TOFW 2009

Do you ever wonder if something you've committed to give your time to is really what you should be doing? It's one of those good-better-best dilemmas, when you're not sure which good thing is best. I wasn't planning on going to Time Out for Women when it came to Pocatello this time because I had just spent money and left my family for Women's Conference and life looks pretty crazy every weekend in June. But, when I found out that a bunch of my best friends were all going, with my good husband's blessing, I split a ticket with one of them and marked on my calendar to go to TOFW on Saturday. Even up until the night before, though, I wondered if my time would be better spent at home, cleaning house, preparing for Youth Conference, or just being with my family. Although all of those things would have been good things to do, I think the Lord knew that this was something I really needed. I learned so much, was touched by the Spirit, and felt renewed and loved again!

...the certainty that comes when you know life's truths.

There were four speakers on Saturday and Hilary Weeks (one of my favorites) was the musical guest. They were all amazing, but the one talk that touched my heart and caused me to ponder the most was Wendy Ulrich's. Her talk was entitled "Weakness: Your Curse or Your Blessing?" She explained that there is a huge difference between sin and weakness. When she explained the difference and compared the two, I could feel it in my heart that the things she taught were true. I suddenly felt lighter, as if a burden had been lifted from my shoulders. I know I'm my own harshest judge, but when I do something I know I shouldn't have done, like lose control and yell at my kids, I feel guilty and bad about it way too long after I've tried to repent and make it better. The biggest reason I think I do this is that when I slip and do it again, it makes me feel like I'm not ever improving, or truly repenting of the sin. When Sis. Ulrich explained that weaknesses are inadequacies, predispositions, emotions, temptations, etc. and that we all have them simply because we are mortals, it really made a lot of sense to me. Jesus also had weaknesses because He was mortal, and had to be so He could know how to succor us in our time of need. Although we should be constantly working to rise above them, many of our weaknesses cannot be eliminated in this life. We must be humble and meek. God will make up the difference through His grace and mercy. She said that Heavenly Father really "gets" where we are. He knows the state we are in, or where our hearts are, and offers us grace and forgiveness so we can become more like Him...who we are meant to be. It reminded me yet again, of the love of my Heavenly Father and that He really does bless me with exactly what I need. I pray that through my weaknesses I can become more humble and someday I can be made perfect through Christ, who strengthens me in my weaker moments.